Mental Health at Work - the Case of 'Anti-Mattering'

I was early for my train back from London the other day, and while I was sitting there, the cleaner came through the carriage. As she approached, I looked up, smiled, and said, "Good morning – thank you for cleaning the carriage for us." I was shocked by her response.

She almost dropped her bag, turned to me with wide eyes, and said, "You spoke to me." I was puzzled and replied, "Yes, I just said good morning and thank you." She went on to tell me that she’d been working there for over three years, and I was the first passenger who had ever greeted her or thanked her for her work. Quite frankly, I was gobsmacked.

How could she feel so invisible at work for so long and still manage to wear the smile I saw on her face? How is it that we, as people, so often fail to notice and appreciate those around us who are providing a service or simply sharing our space?

Over the past few weeks, I’ve had the privilege of working in the mental health field across various industries, and the more people I meet, the more I hear about this sense of invisibility and being overlooked. It’s no surprise that comments like "I feel empty at work" or "I’m starting to resent my manager" or "The stress is getting too much" are becoming increasingly common. People seem to be noticed primarily for their productivity or outcomes, often accompanied by ‘performance development’ feedback.

The statistics surrounding disengagement, workplace stress, and feelings of unimportance are alarmingly high. The term "anti-mattering" captures how this sense of invisibility can drain someone’s energy and self-worth and contribute to unhealthy stress. Our hybrid or work-from-home model impacts our daily interactions, contacts, and connections and complicates how workers need to consider and navigate these needs. We know that feeling valued for our presence, dedication, and contributions is a fundamental human need.

I want to challenge you to join me in taking action, in line with the theme for World Mental Health Day on the 10th of October – Mental Health at Work – to truly notice those around you in the workplace. Acknowledge that they are seen, that their presence matters, and that their efforts are appreciated. A simple smile, a "hello," or a "thank you" can change someone's day, showing them that they are valued. If we all make this small effort, we can create a culture of inclusion and human connection, where every worker – whether colleague or stranger – feels part of something meaningful and valued.

Our life of contrasts...

The cold and the sun. Two seemingly contrasting states and yet, on a day like today, they work in perfect harmony. Just got back from a walk to the gym in the crisp cold air with the warm sun on my back and it was really glorious. It made me think about how many of life's contrasts work really well together - like that salty and sweet popcorn!

I'm often told that my husband and I are 'complete opposites' and I happen to agree in terms of personality, thinking and social style but our relationship works so well because we share the same values and purpose. That common ground. Often opposite demands, needs, and expectations can be managed really well if they are approached with the right attitude and mindset.

I was reading the post on linkedin from @Mind this morning for #menshealthmonth and thought about how so many men face this contrasting challenge in life. They have societal expectations to be strong and capable and yet they are also encouraged to show vulnerability and ask for help.

As our mental health conversations progress and more and more of us are taking up the call to educate, inform, promote, and support - it's good to know that these contrasts are being spoken about. Working together we can normalise these expectations and behaviours in the same way that sweet and sour sauce works together and is, well - delicious!

Glad to be part of the conversation.

Monday thoughts: Embracing mental health awareness, confronting fears and being vulnerable

Mondays often symbolise new beginnings and fresh starts, making it an opportunity to reflect on important aspects of our lives. Today, I want to look into the realm of mental health awareness, fears and vulnerability.

In a world that frequently encourages us to wear masks of strength and invincibility, it is crucial to acknowledge and prioritise our mental well-being. Mental health awareness demands compassion, understanding and open dialogue. By normalising conversations surrounding mental health, we can break the stigma associated with it, creating a supportive environment for those who are struggling.

Addressing fears is an integral part of our personal growth. We all have fears that can sometimes paralyse us, preventing us from reaching our full potential. The ‘what’ if someone sees the real me and doesn’t want to know me anymore?

By acknowledging and facing our fears head-on, we can transform them into catalysts for positive change. It is important to remember that fear is a natural part of being human and it is through embracing it that we can find courage and strength. Feel the fear and do it anyway!

Vulnerability is often seen as a weakness, but in reality, it is a testament to our authenticity and self awareness. It takes immense strength to let down our guard and expose our true selves. By embracing vulnerability, we open ourselves up to closer connections, empathy and growth. Sharing our struggles and triumphs not only nurtures our own mental well-being but also encourages others to do the same.

On this Monday, let's make a commitment to prioritise mental health awareness, confront our fears and embrace vulnerability. Reach out to loved ones, engage in self-reflection and practice self-care.

Let us create a world where mental health is valued and where individuals are empowered to be their authentic selves, free from judgment and shame.

Remember, our collective well-being begins with each one of us. Together, we can build a society that cherishes mental health, compassion and the celebration of vulnerability.

It’s a scary place to go to but with the support of our loved ones, it is possible. It is also vital that our workplaces follow suit.

To enable and create a more inclusive, empathic and supporting workplace, training is needed.

We are here to help.

The photo is from my front garden. Plants make me happy.

Why should companies invest in mental health awareness training?

Mental health awareness training is crucial for companies and their staff for several reasons.

Firstly, promoting mental health awareness creates a supportive and inclusive work environment, fostering employee well-being and productivity. By understanding common mental health challenges such as stress, anxiety and depression, staff members can recognise and empathise with their colleagues' struggles, which in turn reduces stigma and encourages open communication.

Secondly, mental health issues can significantly impact job performance (presentism) and absenteeism. By providing training on recognising the signs of mental health concerns, companies can offer support and resources sooner to prevent these issues from escalating. This proactive approach can minimise the negative effects on productivity and team morale, ultimately benefitting the overall organisational performance.

Mental health awareness training equips employees with coping strategies and self-care techniques. By promoting self-awareness and resilience, companies empower their staff to manage stress and maintain optimal well-being, leading to increased job satisfaction and retention. It’s a win-win situation.

Ultimately, mental health awareness training demonstrates a commitment to the holistic well-being of employees. It sends a powerful message that mental health matters and that the company values its staff's welfare, fostering a culture of compassion and understanding. This according to research, is something many employees value more than ever.

We are here to help. Please contact ase@mrtconsultants.co.uk for a chat.

Family, connection and food

We talk a lot about connection and the importance of feeling part of a shared space – and today, I wanted to talk about meal times.

We live in a world of instant gratification, of constant distraction and busyness.  So what happens in your home around meal times?  Are there shared spaces and connections made whilst eating a meal – or is meal time seen as a time to be tolerated and endured to simpy get through?

Meal times present and opportunity for you and your family!

Numerous studies have been done that show how sharing meals is integral to how your family functions and that it can aid closer relationships and build social and emotional skills for you and your child (ren).

Some positives that are encouraged when you sit down at eat together as a family include:

·       Promoting a safe, secure space for your children that enourages attachment

·       An opportunity for you to role model good behaviour and eating habits and pass these onto your child (ren)

·       A great space to practice social interaction, chatting and conversation and in particular, that all impoartant skill of how to listen to each other in a supportive way

·       Conflict resolution, patience and tolerance will also be needed at meal times and give your child (ren) a change to learn how to adjust, adapt and compromise

·       A huge positive for everyone is that eating together and bonding over food reduces stress levels and releases the feel good chemicals such as dopamine and endorphins.

If you don’t normally eat together, try to implement times when you do eat together as a family.  Start small with breakfast or lunch and build up to eating together as a family whenever possible.    Remember it takes 21 days to form a new habit and 90 days for it to become a regular part of your lifestyle, so stick with a new ‘regime’ and build it up slowly into a habit and then a lifestyle.  (the 21:90 rule!)

If you have teens (or pre-teens) give them ample warning about when dinner is.  Set a time and stick to it.  Institute a ‘rule’ that anytime after (say 5pm) if they are going onto an online game or race or activity that they can’t leave, they need to check with you first if they’ll be able to do this before dinner.  Dinner together needs to be seen as a priority for your family and one that you all participate in.

Make it fun – allow kids to have a say in the menu; to cook some of the meal themselves; mix it up a bit at times (have breakfast for dinner one day!) and swap seats.  Use mealtime to talk about your day e.g. ‘what is your highlight of your day’ and then ‘what is one question you didn’t get answered today’ and ‘tell us something new that happened today or tell us a joke’.  If you run out of ideas, learn a new word from the dictionary every day or put ideas into a hat and pull out a series of questions that you’ve gathered from the internet! Teach those social skills!

Installing the habit of eating and forming connections over food is an essential component of wellbeing and you can start this today!

Enjoy!

Written by Jenni Cole

The connection between self-esteem and mental ill health.

Self-esteem is a critical part of our mental health as it is the foundation of how we see ourselves and have confidence in our abilities. It is the value we place on ourselves, our beliefs about our capabilities and our ability to meet challenges.

High self-esteem is linked to good mental health and a sense of well-being, while low self-esteem can lead to feelings of depression, anxiety and other mental health disorders. It may also get in the way of relationships both at work and privately.

A person with high self-esteem is more confident, self-assured, and has a positive outlook on life. They tend to be better equipped to handle stress, setbacks and challenges because they believe in their ability to overcome obstacles. On the other hand, individuals with low self-esteem often struggle with negative self-talk, self-doubt, and feelings of worthlessness which can lead to a range of mental health problems.

One of the biggest impacts of low self-esteem on mental health is depression. When we have a negative view of ourselves, we are more likely to experience feelings of hopelessness, sadness and despair. This can lead to a vicious cycle, where our low self-esteem makes us more vulnerable to depression which in turn, further wears down our self-esteem.

Anxiety is also a big part of low self-esteem. When we have low self-esteem, we may constantly worry about what others think of us or fear rejection. This can lead to feelings of anxiety and even panic attacks.

Addiction and low self-esteem are also connected. When we don't feel good about ourselves, we may turn to drugs, alcohol or other substances to cope with our negative feelings. This can lead to a range of addiction problems, including substance abuse, gambling addiction and compulsive overeating.

Paying attention to our own and others’ behaviour and getting help sooner rather than later is vital as early intervention is key to recovery and prevention of further decline.

In conclusion, self-esteem is a vital component of mental health, and low self-esteem can have a range of negative impacts on our mental well-being. It is important to cultivate a positive self-image and confidence in our abilities, as this can help us better cope with stress, setbacks and challenges in life.

If you are struggling with low self-esteem, it is important to seek support from a mental health professional who can help you develop strategies to improve your self-esteem and mental health.

Take care!

What's going on in Europe?

Spring is here. Lighter days and nature is waking up properly. I love all seasons but spring is extra special in my world. The birds are singing and the various flowers are showing. Such a beautiful time of the year normally.

One thing weighing on my mind is, like for most of us, the war in Ukraine. I am Swedish and my whole family still lives there. It’s close to Russia in many ways and there have been threats made by Putin towards Sweden. I do not trust him at all. He is a loose cannon and unpredictable. It’s a worry for everyone in Europe.

How do we cope with this and the anxiety that comes with it? What do we do and how can we help others?

There are the practical ways of giving money and supplies to charities and organisations that support Ukraine. You can also offer a home to refugees. Here are a few of the charities:

https://www.unicef.org.uk/donate/donate-now-to-protect-children-in-ukraine

https://donate.redcross.org.uk/appeal/ukraine-crisis-appeal

https://www.support-savethechildren.org/

The tricky part is how we manage in our own minds. The 'what is in our control' versus 'what is outside of our control' comes to mind. When we are able to differentiate between those two and compartmentalise the fears, we can also live in a more relaxed way despite what is going on. In many ways it's similar to how we managed to live with Covid and the fears around that. 

So, work out what you need to do to help yourself.
For me it's:
- avoiding the news at night
- exercising regularly, even if it's just a 20 min walk
- sleeping as well as I possibly can
- eating healthily as much as possible, not all the time by any means. I do enjoy good food and drink...
- seeing family and friends and being grateful I have them
- appreciating the small things like flowers and nature in general

It might sound like mumbo jumbo but it definitely helps me.

Take care of yourself and your loved ones. 

What works for you? Do you know?

There is so much information out there about mental ill health and what we should and shouldn’t do.

As with most things, knowledge and understanding is power and to know what works for us individually is the no 1 thing.

To be told by someone else what you need to do might not be the best thing. Trying things out and working out what actually does work is the way forward in my experience.

I have tried many things in the past, some successful, some not. The one thing I do know is that whatever I do, I must make it part of my routine and to become part of my everyday/week thing to do. I have to like it, feel the difference and look forward to doing it. It takes time for something to become a habit and we have to be prepared to continue for at least 21 days in order for change to happen.

When lockdown happened, I, and most other people, had to change what was my normal routine. Things I had tried in the past without success suddenly became lifesavers. As the lockdown and the changes to our lives continued for such a long time, these habits are now very much ingrained in me.

My husband calls me the spaniel as I am always eager to get out for a walk. Power walks and ‘normal’ walks are a big part of my life and I feel jittery and impatient if I don’t get out. The impact these walks, and nature in general, have on my mental health is immense.

I am absolutely certain that without them, I would have struggled throughout lockdown in particular. I have never seen myself as an anxious or nervy person, still don’t really. However, to get out in nature, with a friend or on my own, releases any of those feelings and I feel more capable of dealing with whatever life throws at me.

So, do you know what helps you keep stress under control, how to keep those low feelings at bay and what lifts your spirits?

Of course, we can’t always be upbeat and feel good but we can ensure we have a better balance in life by using coping skills.

Some us are very private and feel vulnerable sharing feelings with others so for those people it’s even more important to find what helps them.

This and so much more are things we work with at MRT Consultants.

We are here for any questions you might have!

Workplace Wellbeing in 2022?

It’s that time of the year where the days get dark (far too) early, the temperature drops and for some, it’s a tough time of year. The weather plays its part as do the additional costs of Christmas and festive celebrations. What about your mental health and wellbeing over these long winter months?

There are many who are alone - or who feel intense loneliness at this time of the year. You may be fortunate enough to have employment but organisations are not exempt from the ‘winter worries’. For many, they are still recovering from the impact of Covid and many employees are still facing job insecurities or financial worries.

Mental Health First Aid England’s 2021 workplace interviews revealed that ‘47% of respondents said they were having more wellbeing check-ins from their workplace since before the pandemic’ - great news! But we can do more than just check-in!

Here are some tips from MHFA England that your organisation can implement:

Prioritise Wellbeing

Can your firm offer a ‘wellbeing day’ as well as annual leave to support employees? MHFA England lead by example, ‘Our wellbeing strategy includes two total office close down periods – a Wellbeing Week in the summer and one in the winter. The emphasis on ‘total’ is important as it means all employees really do engage in ‘proper downtime’.

Find out what your employees really think

Take stock of how your business has done for the past year with staff morale and wellbeing. Let your staff have a say in their workplace experience. Draw up an anonymous survey to really gauge how everyone is feeling and use the feedback to help you set your goals for the new year with your people, culture, and wellbeing projects.

Check-in regularly with your team members

Encourage everyone to check in with themselves on a regular basis by asking, ‘how do I feel today mentally and physically?’ and ‘am I using helpful coping strategies?’. MHFA England’s My Whole Self MOT is a great tool to use. This will help highlight loneliness, anxiety and stress and give the opportunity to catch this before it develops into more worrying issues.

Be emotionally aware of others

As the world opens up, some will rush back in - but others will feel apprehension and even anxiety with returning to social situations. Everyone is different, so find what works for you and be respectful of the choices that others’ make. ‘Forced fun’ is no fun for anyone!

New year, new you.

Put mental health and wellbeing at the heart of your strategy for 2022. No matter what else, it’s more important than ever that we look after ourselves and our teams.

It may mean changing priorities or simply listening to your employees more - but do something different in 2022!

We have lots to offer your organisation, from bespoke webinars or IRL sessions to accredited Mental Health First Aid training. Ask us for more information: ase@mrtconsultants.co.uk

We’d love to support you and your staff in 2022

Daring to talk about mental health

How do we dare to be open and accepting of others and our own mental health issues? What does it take to feel comfortable with someone at work?

The fear of being judged is very real. The ‘what if’ can often show itself. Am I being looked at differently or treated differently? Do they trust me to do my job properly? Do they think I will be signed off work often?

This is all part of the change with work and company culture within an organisation. When acceptance starts at the top, the likelihood of acceptance further down is more likely.

So, how can this be done? What does your workplace do at the moment?

According to Mind, if you do decide to tell your employer about your mental health situation, think about:

• How and when to do it. It can be helpful to have a note from your doctor to help explain your situation.

• How much information you want to give. You don’t have to go into personal details, just focus on how your mental health problem impacts on your job.

• Whom to share it with. For example, the human resources (HR) department may know your diagnosis, but they don't have to tell your supervisor or colleagues.

There are many people working towards enabling disclosure and openness with mental health in the same way we talk about other illnesses or disabilities.

How good it would be to have an open discussion about all disabilities or setbacks and have understanding and empathy as the norm.

Particularly now as we are about to go back into the workplaces after our Covid year, it is even more relevant and important to enable people to talk. Empower people to open up without shame and vulnerability. Research has shown that more people than ever are suffering with anxiety and depression so it is up to the employers to create a welcoming and empathic workplace to return to.

This is what MRT Consultants strives towards. We help companies support their staff to enable an open work culture for acceptance of differences and disabilities.

Get in touch to find out more about how we can support your workplace and employees.

The Pandemic - how has it affected you?

So, here we are, lockdown 3.0. Who would have ever imagined us here a year ago?

This will be a time to talk about in years to come for sure. As with most things, there will be good and bad parts.

For me, it has changed our company and the way we work. After only delivering workshops and seminars in real life, suddenly we are delivering all over the world! This situation forced us to think outside of the box and it has paid off. We miss real life interaction as human connection is what we are about. However, in a funny way, this pandemic has enabled us to reach more people which is a good thing.

On a personal level I am grateful to have my family, friends and home. Living in a small town has also been good as it enables more connections and meeting people out and about. I have upped my exercise in this past year by power walking, cycling and doing pilates at least 5 times a week. I used to go to a club before but felt limited as the classes would get full and I couldn't always do the classes I wanted. Now I go to my computer, log in and do it when it suits me. I also have quality time with various friends where we walk and talk non stop for our 10km walks. My husband always asks what on earth do we talk about…he’s better off not knowing! He has been an incredible person to be locked down with as he loves cooking and I get 2 meals a day served. Now that is a big positive in my world!

I have noticed that we tend to find it easier to talk about the negatives so I would love to hear the positives from people. There will be something that you have discovered along the way.

I have a need to hold on to the positive thoughts as there are just too many negatives around and it makes me feel low. Something that helps me is not watching the news in the evenings, writing in my journal and reading good books.

What has been a positive for you? Work wise or privately? What have you learnt? How do you help yourself to be the best you can be?

It’s ok to feel low at times, to always be positive is not possible. It’s just a matter of bouncing back and not staying down so it becomes detrimental to your mental health. Find what works for you, we are all different.

If nothing else, have flowers in your home! They brighten up any day!

2020 - what a year

Who would have predicted a year ago what was ahead of us? Looking back it has been a year of many events and emotions. We all have different experiences and feelings on what has been happening and a lot to digest.

Some have liked it and found it freeing in a funny way. No musts of going places and meeting people. It has allowed them time to spend with their families and reconnecting in a way they hadn’t been able to normally. So many live in a constant state of stress and not being enough and this unexpected situation suddenly enabled them to just be.

The other side has been quite different, causing havoc, stress and uncertainty both emotionally and financially. Many losing their jobs, not being able to pay rent or mortgages. Relationships suffering because of these situations.

Then there’s the in between, the people holding on to their jobs, adjusting and coping even if it’s been tough. It’s been so unpredictable, who is coping and who isn’t. Some who I assumed would be fine haven’t been and others who I thought would struggle have been fine.

What makes us so different? Why do some people manage better than others?

I am not referring to financial difficulties during Covid but rather the emotional coping skills some people possess and others don’t.

I think a lot comes down to resilience and the ability to control the ‘controlable’. The way we respond to situations and allow them to take over or not. How we bounce back rather than dwelling.

This is something we learn and become used to so if a person has not had to deal with many difficulties in their lives and suddenly face them during a pandemic, the ability to cope might not be there.

We can start to learn by reading, talking and noticing other people around us and what they do. Awareness and knowledge helps greatly. Compassion, empathy and gratitude for what we do have also plays a big part in how we deal with difficult situations.

What have you learnt during this year? What has been, if anything, the silver lining in your life?

For me, it has been having a home to work from, the ability to adjust and change our work to go online, spending more time outdoors with some friends whilst exercising, having my husband to be with and support me who also happens to be a great cook and also generally slowing down in life. Noticing nature and the surroundings in a way I haven’t done before has also been lovely.

Self-soothing - such an important part of self-care...

We ran a workshop last week that focused on coping skills in times of stress and one of the best and easiest ways to ensure you have reserves to cope with times of stress - is self-care. Taking care of yourself and making sure that your feelings, energy and resources are replenished so that you have the resilience to cope with adversity or times of concern.

But there are healthy coping skills - and unhealthy ones! And often the differentiation is not that clear. Learning how to make yourself feel better in a way that actually produces a replenishment of your emotions and resources - takes time and intent!

Take time out to soothe yourself when you’re faced with difficulties:

• When your day is becoming stressful and you’re feeling anxious

• When your emotions feel like they’re taking over and making you on edge

• When you’re exhausted and just feel like you’ve had enough

• When you have bad news or heartache

• When you find yourself thinking about or wanting to act in a self-destructive way

• When you feel hyper-sensitive and defensive

Everyone will find different ways to self-soothe - you need to work out the right way for you. It may be just one thing that is your ‘go-to’ escape - or you may prefer a combination of different options. If you’re not sure, pick a few from the list below and give them a try. Find your favourite and then use it whenever you need to self-soothe or desensitise….

Most importantly - include others in this practice - especially your children!

Connection- more important then ever

I just listened to a lovely speaker who talked about connection and how it affects us a human beings and the impact it has on both our mental and physical health.

Do you know that when we have good, deep connection with friends and family, we improve our chances of longevity and health?

Do you also know that showing vulnerability will pay off in the end? It tends to have a domino effect, when one person dares to bare, more people follow.

How many times do we say ‘I’m fine’ when we aren’t? How many times do we actually say what we need when we feel low?

Not often enough is the answer. What stops us? Why is to so hard to show feelings when we are low? Happy and positive feelings are a lot easier to share, aren’t they?

The fear of being judged and fear of rejection are 2 reasons. To step out of that comfort zone takes courage and time but it’s worth it.

When we open up and are received by someone else who shows they care and listen no matter what, that is the best feeling ever. So, if we show others that being vulnerable is ok, we help others to dare to do the same.

Check out this talk, it’s 10 mins of your time: https://youtu.be/WKUgVpCqvfY

What can you do to improve connection? How can you reach out to people?

We have a few gatherings on our road every year and it is such a lovely way to get to know the neighbours. There is a street party every summer, a children’s play day in the autumn, a ladies night, Safari supper and other things through out the year. A great way to be connected to others nearby.

Obviously during Covid, a lot of this has not been possible but we have found other ways to connect via the WhatsApp group, impromptu get togethers outside and just chatting when we bump into each other. It feels good to be part of a community.

There are many people that are lonely around us. This is a problem in big and small communities and it affects our mental health in a detrimental way. We all need connection and feel a belonging whether it’s with neighbours, friends, work colleagues or clubs.

What can we do to be more present and create connection when and if needed? Are there people around us that are longing to belong?

Have a look around you and see what you can do. It all helps.

Enjoy!

Today is World Suicide Prevention Day...

I wonder what you were doing today and if you knew it was ‘World Suicide Prevention Day’? Did you pause and have a think about it - look at some news or educational articles? Pick up the phone and call someone to check in with them?

It’s an extremely troubling and sad fact that every 40 seconds someone takes their own life worldwide. In that same time frame, another 20 people attempt suicide. And the circles of people affected by these actions is enormous.

I often wonder why in the year 2020, when we can pick up the phone and call anyone at a moment’s notice when the world is seemingly so connected and accessible, there are still people who feel so alone, vulnerable and stranded with their thoughts and emotions. I firmly believe it is each and every one of our responsibility to care for each other and make a difference. To reach out and connect and ‘work together to prevent suicide’.

I joined the ‘Mental Health and Wellbeing Show’ this morning and it was truly humbling listening to testimonials from people who have struggled with suicidal thoughts and attempts. Something one of the speakers said really stayed with me. He said that with all the battles that he faces he lives by a simple mantra: 'I live for what difference I can make today'. It sounds so simple and yet it has the capacity to be life-changing for both yourself and others. Instead of worrying about the next thing, the next day, the things outside of your control, focus on the simplest thing that you can do today to make a difference - to your life or others. One step at a time. One small difference each day.

After listing to this webinar I popped down to a local charity shop to buy my personal ‘wellbeing tool’ - a jigsaw puzzle and as I was leaving I noticed a woman looking upset in the corner. Turns out the card payment machine wasn’t working and she was £2 short to buy her item. I gave her two coins and she was extremely grateful and rushed to pay. I was at my car when she came out and I saw her walk up to a lady with a child in a pram and hand them the item. The mum broke into the biggest smile and I could hear the child’s animated voice and I couldn’t stop smiling too. My small difference (giving £2 to a stranger) seems to have had an effect on several people - and I have a feeling that positive effect will continue.

Make a difference - no matter how small - and make it today.

Sitting...and sitting...and sitting...what's the down side?

A friend of mine posted a blog from THE MENTAL ELF by Susie Rudge and it looked at the impact that our sedentary lifestyle has on our mental health. It discussed the difference between complete inactivity vs moderate inactivity:

“In their paper, Hallgren et al. (2019) define TV watching as a passive sedentary behaviour. They set out to ascertain the impact on depression of replacing this with either:

• Mentally active sedentary behaviour (e.g. sitting in a meeting, reading)

• Light physical activity (e.g. walking) or

• Moderate-to-vigorous physical activity (e.g. jogging, swimming).”

They make the link between taking charge of your ‘sedentary lifestyle’ and any depressive or low mood conditions you may experience. The conclusion they reached is:

“Conclusions

The authors concluded that passive sedentary behaviours may increase the risk of depression in adults and that substituting completely passive sedentary behaviour (e.g. taking a bath, watching TV, listening to music) with mentally active sedentary behaviour (e.g. knitting, sitting in a meeting, office work), light physical activity (e.g. walking) and moderate to vigorous physical activity (e.g. jogging, swimming) may reduce the risk of depression symptoms occurring in adults.

Mentally active sedentary behaviour may function as a protective factor in that it could reduce the opportunity for negative thought processes. Moreover, physical activity is known to reduce stress hormones and increase positive neurological processes thought to influence and regulate mood in humans.”

So take a look around you and see what you are doing during your day, what your family is doing, friends and colleagues. Try and encourage as much variety as possible to avoid a purely sedentary day, especially if you or someone you know is prone to periods of low mood or depression.

If you’d like to read the full blog here it is: https://www.nationalelfservice.net/mental-health/depression/sedentary-behaviour-increase-likelihood-developing-major-depression/

Keep active!

Staying home...'love in action'...

We’ve had a great few weeks of delivering webinars focusing on how to find the positives and opportunities to thrive during these times of social isolation. Throughout all the discussions we’ve had a few positives seem to be recurring themes:

• people are exercising more

• people are sleeping longer

• people are feeling more connected to their immediate neighbours and communities

• people are learning more

• many people are enjoying the time at home without the commute to work

• people are feeling more grounded (probably the result of the baking & gardening taking place)

• people are feeling gratitude

Despite individual situations and concerns, these positives are having a direct impact on people’s physical and mental health. Yes, there are frustrations, fears and anxieties - but the leveling playing field seems to be the knowledge that everyone is in this together and no one has been singled out. The current situation is affecting everyone - globally - and this seems to give it a sense of normalcy that helps to reduce escalating anxiety.

I have been supporting a group over the past 8 weeks that has been focused on addressing anxiety and depression with a toolkit of physical activity, mental health and nutrition advice. It has been remarkable to witness the journey that many of the participants have traveled and seen the power that group support and accountability has. A journey I would highly recommend: Recognise, Reset & Rebuild https://www.facebook.com/groups/rrr2020/

This sentiment of ‘we can do this together’ is so fantastically summed up in this saying posted by the COVID-19 response team in Belfast. This was a campaign launched to get people to see that the stay-at-home decree was not the end of the world - but in fact the ‘greatest act of love’ the world has ever seen.

From our point of view - we all need each other even more than ever. We need the human connection, the feeling of community and the tools to manage our mental health and to support those around us.

We’ve just heard that Mental Health First Aid Courses will now be possible to deliver online - so we’ll be offering training from the end of the month for those who want to continue their areas of growth into accreditation as a Mental Health First Aider.

Keep safe!

How are different personality types coping with social distancing?

We’re getting used to being physically and socially distanced from people.  While we all know and understand the reasoning and value behind it – it doesn’t mean that we are finding it easy.  But there are definitely some personality types that are finding it easier than others!

Some people feel like they are literally in solitary confinement whereas others are actually relishing the time alone.  Is this because some people are naturally introverts who thrive in quieter more 1-1 situations?  Or is it something more?

On the basis of nature and biology, humans are social creatures who are designed to thrive in groups and rely on each other for survival. This is where the phrase ‘strength in numbers’ evolved from as well as the laws of natural selection.  Although the world is vastly different from these primitive survival days, we still have an instinct to remain close to other people.  It is one of our basic human needs for connection.

When we are in a situation where proximity to others is removed, our bodies will naturally respond with a level of stress.  As with all stress, we experience the adrenaline that fuels the flight or fight response. However, being in isolation adds another risk - loneliness. Loneliness is one of the most powerful mental and emotional stressors often manifesting in increased anxiety and depression. With no sign of social distancing ending, this stress is likely to increase, so if you know of someone who is experiencing added loneliness at this time - please be extra mindful and vigilant of their mental health.

But then there are those who seem to be thoroughly happy with the social isolation situation. It’s often found that someone who enjoyed playing alone as a child – will continue to thrive when they are isolated from others as an adult. They often present with better mental health and don’t experience ‘FOMO’ (fear of missing out) as intensely as others do and they may also seem to be more grounded.  The upside of this behaviour is often more focus and creativity and self-discipline.

So, even if you’re a person who just loves being with others, take this time to tap into your other side.  Allow yourself the time to really hone your focus and self-awareness skills.  Use the time for reflection and learning and get in touch with your thoughts, feelings and what really makes you happy.  Do you enjoy time with yourself?  If not – why not?   How is your relationship with yourself?  What is your sense-of-self and are you happy with all aspects of yourself?  Do you value yourself?

Important questions – hope you’ll take time to answer them.

Remember – you are the one person you can be sure you will always have in your life!

And the weeks tick by....

We are all now well and truly entrenched in physical and social distancing and for many people this means working from home.   All sorts of new thoughts, feelings and stressors are joining our lives.

In our business, we have really noticed significant changes in the last few weeks from the initial panic and shock and distinct fear that many people were verbalising, to increased anxiety and anger at the situation.  Clients are asking for support for their staff who are feeling increased levels of stress and anxiety with this isolation.  Many are finding the unknown and uncertainty around the end date for COVID-19 extremely unsettling. These feelings parallel the loss cycle that many people experience with grief and understanding this will help you (and others) to normalise these feelings and realise that having such extreme reactions is part of a process of coming to terms with what is no longer.  The important thing is to keep moving through the stages until you are able to find acceptance and a way to move forward.   This requires effort, energy and intention.

There was a very interesting virtual talk (Getahead Festival) last week on stress and how it relates to energy.  How energy cycles in turn feed back into stress and when this stress becomes a ‘struggle’, you are effectively incapable of making clear decisions or having clear thoughts.  It’s imperative to find relief from this struggle in order to close the cycle of stress.  Tools that are essential for this are sleep (where you body and mind can recover from stress); exercise, talking; journaling; touch or hugging; breathing; vision; music or sharing.  Our brain’s natural default is social cognition, so for us to re-group and re-charge, we need to allow it to make these social connections.

Just a few things to think about as we battle on through the coming weeks.

Stay safe and let us know if we can help in any way: ase@mrtconsultants.co.uk

Some practical tips for working @ home...

Amidst all the uncertainty and fear that is prevailing in the UK and world at the moment, working from home is causing additional stressors.

Today, Mental Health First Aid England has launched its ‘Your Whole Self’ campaign with the tag line ‘Bring your whole self to work - wherever that may be’.

it’s a great read with a lot of practical ideas for how to cope in these trying times:

Åse and I will be posting tips and ideas on how to get through the days in isolation or working from home and will be offering webinars to keep teams talking and together.

Get in touch to find out more. ase@mrtconsultants.co.uk www.mrtconsultants.co.uk

Stay safe!

https://mhfastorage.blob.core.windows.net/mhfastoragecontainer/ff373e6e6c68ea11a811000d3ab824df/Supporting%20your%20mental%20health%20while%20working%20from%20home.pdf?sv=2015-07-08&sr=b&sig=jSIp1Eg%2BNTno5qSiUJPzaUYTLggjw%2Fueo4HEhwV%2BaqQ%3D&se=2020-03-18T13%3A17%3A51Z&sp=r