What makes a person a good co worker to be around? Why do some people get on with ‘everyone’ and some don’t?
Emotional intelligence can be one of the reasons. A person who is emotionally intelligent tends to read people and situations better than others and can therefore also handle them in a different way.
Their ability to handle situations well is now recognised as a top skill by companies.
In a 2011 Career Builder Survey of more than 2,600 hiring managers and human resource professionals, 71% stated they valued emotional intelligence in an employee over IQ; 75% said they were more likely to promote a highly emotionally intelligent worker; and 59% claimed they’d pass up a candidate with a high IQ but low emotional intelligence.
So what is all of this about? What qualities does a person with high emotional intelligence possess? Can they be learnt?
Yes, I do believe we can learn to become emotionally intelligent. Some have it naturally and others have to learn. In order to learn, you have to be motivated and understand why this is important.
Emotional intelligence definition: ’ the capacity to be aware of, control, and express one's emotions, and to handle interpersonal relationships judiciously and empathetically.’
According to Daniel Goleman , an American psychologist who helped to popularise emotional intelligence, there are five key elements to it:
Self-awareness. - ‘ What am I feeling and what is my part?’
Self-regulation. - Write a journal and gratitude journal regularly.
Motivation. - What do I want in my life and why? What difference will it make? Create a mind map that you can see daily.
Empathy. - Who do you know that is empathic, what do they do and how do they make you feel? Watch and learn and demonstrate.
Social skills. - How do you reach out to others and how often? How do you interact? Yet again, do you have someone you admire to learn from?
When someone has high emotional intelligence, they can put aside another persons attacks or behaviour as they understand it’s not about them but the person who is doing it. They don’t take it personally and can differentiate between useful and nasty criticism or feedback and learn from it.
As most things we learn, it takes time and practise which means understanding and implementing these skills as often as one can. Eventually they become second nature and part of us.
MRT Consultants offer training to help with these skills.
Please DM or e-mail for further information!
Wish you all a great continuous summer wherever you are!
